The Misadventures of Mistletoe
by Dignified Madman
Summary: It is the last Christmas at Hogwarts for the Marauders. What better way to spend it than have a huge Christmas bash in the Room of Requirement? The whole fiction is rated Mature for RemusSirius action in later chapters. Each chapter is individually rated
1. Waxing Moon and Mistletoe

**Title:** The Misadventures of Mistletoe  
**Fandom:** Harry Potter  
**Author:** Dignified Madman  
**Pairing:** Remus/Sirius  
**Rating:** Mature  
**Summary: **It is the last Christmas at Hogwarts for the Marauders. What better way to spend it than have a huge Christmas bash in the Room of Requirement? The whole fiction is rated Mature for Remus/Sirius action in later chapters. Each chapter is individually rated base on their content.  
**Disclaimer:** I do not own these characters. They are the property of J.K. Rowling.

* * *

**Chapter One:** Waxing Moon and Mistletoe  
**Rating:** Teen  
**Word count: **546  
**Summary: **The date of the Christmas party has finally arrives, but so has the Waxing Gibbous.  
**A/N:** Sorry, no slash in this chapter :(. But I promise it will come!

Remus Lupin looked out the window at the end of the hall on the seventh floor. He gave a shallow sigh; the moon was almost full. Remus would have loved nothing better than to be in his bed with a good book and a bar of chocolate, but unfortunately that would not be possible. He had made an agreement with his fellow marauders to come to their secret Christmas bash, and it wasn't like him to back out of plans, no matter how absurd they were. There was also another reason Remus was at the party; he was unconsciously hoping that he would bump into Sirius under the mistletoe.

Remus gave one last glance out the window before walking past the wall space where the room was supposed to be. He wished for the room to appear and when he opened his eyes the door was there. He gave a curt nod to Peter before entering the party: the whole while he held his breath.

Remus was hit by a wave of noise as he opened the door, making his head spin. As his ears adjusted, Remus gazed around the room. The decorations were festive and busy. The walls were covered in wreaths of holly, there were about a dozen trees scattered around the floor, and much to Remus' discomfort, there were a countless number of mistletoe hanging from the ceiling. Remus barely let out a sigh before a familiar voice called his name.

"Oi, Remus!" James Potter waved at Remus from across the room before bounding over towards his friend.

Remus put on a smile and greeted James, "Hello Prongs. This is quite some party."

"Isn't it?" He said as he waved at a couple of guys by the refreshment table. "I suppose you haven't seen Pads yet?"

"Not since dinner," he replied, ducking as an enchanted Christmas ball flew past his head.

"Oh, alright then," James said sounding dejected. Suddenly his face lit up, "Um, Moon, I'll catch up with you later, ok?"

Remus followed James' gaze to the door. His eyes instantly recognized the red head standing by the door.

Much to his surprise, Lily Evans was at their Christmas party. She was with two other girls in their year. Remus figured that they must have dragged her to the bash.

Remus turned to James to tell him that they would talk later, but the movement was in vain, for James was already beside Lily.

Remus watched the couple for a moment before a sixth year girl swooped down and stole his attention.

"Hi Remus!" she said beaming.

"Er- hello," he said trying to be friendly.

The girl continued to smile and moved closer to Remus, "I just wanted to say this is a lovely party."

"Thank you," he said as he took a step backwards.

She continued to garble nonsense at Remus while steadily advancing. As Remus backed away from her, her smile began to broaden. Remus gave a confused glance upwards and spotted mistletoe not ten centimetres from his head. Finally he understood the girl's motives. He looked around frantically for a way out before he ended up in a liplock.

"Alright everyone," a voice shouted from the direction of the door, "the party can begin now, Sirius Black has arrived!"


	2. The Arrival of Sirius Black

**Chapter Two:** The Arrival of Sirius Black  
**Rating:** Teen  
**Word count: **316  
**Summary: **Sirius Black is finally at the party. He had brought some crates with him. What could be in the crates? It can't be anything good.   
**A/N:** Once again another slashless chapter.

Remus turned to the door and, much to his relief, he saw Sirius enter the room followed by a series of crates. "Oi, Remus! Come and give me a hand with these!"

This was the distraction he needed. Remus apologized to the Hufflepuff girl and went over to Sirius, "What are in the crates?"

"What, no 'hello Sirius, how are you doing Sirius'?" Sirius said in his mock offended voice.

Remus let out a sigh. He went through this at least once a week with Sirius. "Hello Sirius. How are you Sirius? What are in the crates Sirius?" he asked in a monotone voice.

Sirius set the crates down beside the refreshment table. He leaned up against them, "Here, let's play a little game. If you can guess what's in these crates, I'll let you have the honour of being seen in my presence," Remus sighed, "Here, I'll give you a hint: I went to Honeydukes. Guess what I nicked."

Remus looked at the crates wryly, "Something tells me it's not just chocolate."

"Actually, it is … mainly. There might be a few other surprises, but I'm sure you'll love those too."

Remus eyes Sirius, he figured that the boy just happened to forget a few of the details.

"Here, we'll unload them right onto this here table," he said, giving the table a little pat.

Remus took out his wand, and flicked it at the crates. "You know you are going to get into serious trouble one of these days."

"No one'll ever find out. I barely took an eighth of their stock!"

"That's not the point, Sirius," it was like reasoning with a child. "What are those?" Two bottles levitated past his head.

Sirius gave Remus a sheepish grin, "Oh, did I forget to mention that I also stopped off at the Three Broom Sticks?"

Remus rolled his eyes, and finished unpacking the crates.


	3. Tarts and Chocolate

**Chapter Three:** Tarts and Chocolate  
**Rating:** Teen  
**Word count: **821  
**Summary: **Remus is jealous when a girl approaches Sirius and steals his attention away.  
**A/N:** R/S slash is strongly hinted in this chapter. It's a start! The writing style changes slightly and the reader gets an image of what goes on in Remus' mind.

"Sirius! Hello," someone was calling Sirius. A _female_ someone was calling Sirius. Remus looked around, and his eyes made contact with a girl who was waving her arms so rapidly it was a wonder she didn't take off in flight. "Oooh, whadya bring?" She said skipping over to the boys, well, more likely Sirius. Remus recognized this girl as Briar Conway, a sixth-year Gryffindor.

"Let me show you," he said, giving her his famous charming grin. In Remus' opinion the girl didn't deserve the grin. He folded his arms, and glared as Sirius produced a stack of cups. He poured her a cup of what Remus assumed was Firewhisky, but he couldn't be sure, "For the lovely lady." He handed her the glass and she giggled feverishly.

'Lovely my arse,' Remus thought.

She took a step towards him and looked up. She had a surprised look on her face that spelled 'bad acting'. "Ooh, look Sirius," she pointed above, "we're under the mistletoe."

Remus waited for Sirius to walk away from her and not give her a second glance. He stood there smugly, waiting for the tart, which she so obviously was, to get rejected.

Sirius looked up at the mistletoe then grinned … again, "Looks like you are the first lucky lady to receive a kiss from yours truly," said Sirius as arrogantly as ever.

Remus gripped the table, his knuckles turning white, as he watched Sirius give Briar a kiss. Well, kiss was an understatement. She pretty much sucked his face off; it was like some one put a Superstick charm on her lips. Okay, Remus was exaggerating a little bit, but still.

"You alright, Moony?" Remus was startled by the hand that was laid on his shoulder. Remus forced himself to pry his eyes away from Sirius and the tart.

"I'm alright, Prongs," he said, lying through his teeth, "It's just my furry little problem is coming soon."

"Well, you should get some rest then," James said as he poured two glasses of the assumed Firewhisky. He gave James a confused stare, "One's for Lily. Not that she'll drink it or anything, but common courtesy … you know." He raised his drink at Remus and disappeared into the crowd.

Remus turned back to Sirius and, much to his displeasure, the tart was still there. It seemed as if they were in a full out conversation. Remus wondered how one could have a conversation with someone who was a complete air-head. He glared daggers at her. The way she smiled at him and pushed her boobs out was sickening.

After an infinite amount of time, Sirius removed himself from the flirtatious clutches of She-Who-No-Longer-Deserved-A-Name and returned to the snack table.

Remus silently gloated as the girl pouted and sulked away.

"Charming girl, really," Remus couldn't help but notice the hint of sarcasm in Sirius' voice.

"Indeed."

"Couldn't stop talking about me, that one," Sirius said as he grabbed a chocolate bar from the table. He took a bite of the chocolate bar, and watched the crowd.

Remus stared at Sirius' lips. Those succulent lips, covered in chocolate. Remus would have loved to taste those lips.

"Want a bar?"

He could just imagine himself melting on Sirius' lips, just like the chocolate. All he had to do was –  
"Remus did you just hear what I said?" Remus was being rudely pulled from his fantasy. "I just asked if you wanted a chocolate bar." Sirius dangled a chocolate bar in front of Remus' face.

"What? Oh … sure!" he said as he quickly grabbed the chocolate bar.

"Moony, you alright?"

"Just feeling a bit under the weather," Remus said as he took a bite of his chocolate. "The moon is nearly full."

"Moon, do you want to go rest?" concern was evident in Sirius' voice, "If you want, I can take you back to the common room. You know, just say you had a bit too much to drink."

Remus though about the situation, and it sounded quite tempting. He pictured himself alone with Sirius in the common room. Sirius and he sitting on a couch together by the fire, their bodies pressed together. A shiver of pleasure ran up his spine.

"No, I'm ok Sirius," the word came out of his mouth uncontrolled, "I'm fine. I'll stay at the party." Remus could have kicked himself for saying that. Maybe he was scared of what would happen.

"Oh, alright then," Sirius said. Did Remus detect a hint of disappointment in Sirius' voice? Was his friend actually looking forward to being alone with him?

"Maybe I'll go up in a little bit. I wouldn't want anything weird happening. Always better to be safe than sorry."

Sirius' face twitched into a little smile, "Alright, suit yourself. Here, have another bar."

Remus caught the bar the Sirius tossed at him, and took a satisfied bite. Finally, things were turning out for the better.


	4. Spiked Punch For All

**Chapter Four:** Spiked Punch For All  
**Rating:** Teen  
**Word count: **1340  
**Summary: **Once again, Sirius is approached by a girl. This time she brings a friend along for Remus. The couples head off to the dance floor where they are greeted by an unexpected drunk. By the end of the chapter Remus ends up under the mistletoe.  
**A/N:** Sirius' dance was inspired by fanart I saw where his naval was exposed. The marauders were drawn sitting casually, and his naval was exposed. I don't get that. So I decided to dedicate his dance to that picture, which can be found at http:// images. /goldseven/wp Marauderscol.jpg (without spaces)

Remus leaned on the table and watched the party taking place around him. He tried to absorb his surroundings, but dirty thoughts of Sirius continually flooded into his head.

"Wotcher Sirius, Remus?" Remus looked around for the voice that called his name. His eyes fell upon two girls that were headed their way. He recognized them as the girls that Lily entered with: Kira Foxstone from Ravenclaw and Jessica Weller from Gryffindor, both seventh years.

"Hello, ladies," Sirius said with that grin again. "Can I get you both something to drink?"

"Oh, no, thank you," Jessica said. Remus figured she was the ringleader of whatever they were plotting.

"Then what can I do for you?" Sirius ran his fingers through his hair casually.

"I was just wondering if you wanted to dance," she said, as causal as he.

"I think I can spare a few moments for someone such as yourself." Sirius tossed his hair in a relaxed manor. 'Arrogant bastard,' Remus thought as he itched to touch the dark locks.

"Remus," the other girl finally spoke up, "I was wondering if you would like to dance with me." She was obviously the shy one of the group.

"Uh – what?" Remus said, thrown by the question. A sharp nudge in the ribs caused Remus to agree to the dance.

"Oh, hold on a second," Sirius said, holding up his index finger, "I almost forgot." He took one of the bottles of alcohol from the table and poured the contents into the innocent-looking punch on the other end. "There, now everything is perfect." He discarded the bottle.

"Sirius," Remus hissed. "Should you really have done that?"

"Oh come off it," Sirius snapped back before extending his arm to Jessica, "Now, where were we?"

Remus shot a wry glance at the punch bowl before he lead Kira to the dance floor. His eyes, instead of being on his dance partner, were on Sirius. The song that was playing was a fast one. Remus was relieved that he did not have to be touching the girl, and that Sirius was not being touched by his girl.

He was swaying in time to the music, trying desperately not to trod on the girl's feet. It was obvious that Remus was not a very good dancer. Even with this being the case, Kira seemed to be enjoying herself. Remus looked over to see what Sirius was doing. The Gryffindor boy appeared to be attempting to belly dance. He had his shirt lifted, exposing his stomach, and he was shaking his hips. The audience around him seemed to fuel his actions. His movements became larger and more obscene. To Remus' relief, the song came to an end. He didn't think he would be able to watch Sirius without certain parts of him reacting to the seductive dance.

"This is my favourite song," Kira said softly. Remus had forgotten she was there. When Remus finally came back to his senses, he realized that her favourite song was a slow one. He also realized that she was waiting for his move.

'I should have left when I had the chance,' Remus mentally kicked himself as he put his arms around the girl's waist. She reached up and put her arms around Remus' neck, drawing them in closer to each other. Remus felt uncomfortable, this being the reason he hated slow dancing. They slowly revolved around a fixed point, shifting weight from foot to foot.

On every half turn, Remus looked over at Sirius. Apparently, Sirius was enjoying himself much more than Remus was. He jealously watched Sirius' hand slide lower and lower down Jessica's back.

"So, Remus, how have your holidays been," Kira asked, trying to start a conversation. Once again, he had forgotten she was there.

"What-oh- They've been ok. How about yours?" he said, still gyrating with the girl.

"Oh, mine have been quite good. My parents wanted me home for Christmas, but …" Remus completely tuned Kira out. He was too busy watching Sirius. His eyes narrowed as he heard Jessica's girlish giggle then point to the ceiling. Of course, there was mistletoe above their heads. 'There's too much bloody mistletoe,' Remus grumbled in his mind. For the second time that night, Remus had to watch Sirius' lips make contact with someone's other than his own.

"Dosh you mind if I cut in for thish dansh?" the drunken voice brought him back to reality.

"Lily Evans?" both Remus and Kira said, their mouths wide open.

"What?" she said, flailing her arms madly, "You bosh look shoo shurprised." Remus couldn't believe what he was seeing. Lily Evans. Drunk. Those are two words he never thought would be used together. Ever.

"Lily, what did you drink?" Kira said, letting go of Remus.

"I didn't drink nothing," Lily, said swaying slightly on the spot. "I only had one or four glashes of punch. It'sh really good, you know." Remus knew he should have done something about the punch.

"Lily," James said, frantically pushing through the crowd. Remus could tell that he was trying to be responsible for Lily.

"She's over here," Remus called out to James.

"Shhh," Lily giggled, "I don't want him to know I'm here." Remus seriously wished he had done something about the punch.

"I don't know what happened," James said, bewildered and out of breath. "Lily refused to touch the stuff I brought her, she only drank the punch. Next thing I know, she's disappeared."

"Sirius." That was all Remus had to say for James' look of confusion to be replaced by on of realization.

"I knew she was acting funny," he said before carting Lily off, "Let's go sit over here for a while."

"But I wantsh to dansh," Lily slurred. Remus watched James drag Lily away. 'I'd never thought I'd see the day,' he thought with a chuckle.

"What was that all about?' Sirius had finally decided to join Remus.

"Well, let's see … your spiked punch caused Lily Evans to become intoxicated," Remus said. He had to work very hard to control his voice, for the site of Sirius, all sweaty after dancing, almost gave him a coronary.

"Bloody brilliant," Sirius said beaming. "That girl needs to let her hair down more often. I don't understand what James' sees in her." Sirius was so immature sometimes … most of the time.

"Look…"

"Shh…" Remus turned around to see a couple of sixth year Hufflepuffs pointing at him and giggling. They instantly stopped as soon as they realized Remus was watching them.

"What's so funny?" Sirius turned around, asking the girls.

The girls began rapidly talking between themselves. Remus could hear only snippets of their conversation, "You tell him." "No you tell him." Finally one of the girls stepped forward, "Um … you both are under the mistletoe." The girls burst out into giggles.

"Well, what do you know Remus … we are," Sirius said, an arrogant tone in his voice. Remus grudgingly looked up, and sure enough there it was, right about their heads. Remus began to panic. He would have loved to snog Sirius, but not here, out in the open.

"Hm …" Sirius said contemplating the situation with a smirk plastered on his face, "what should we do?" Sirius turned to face the group of girls that had now formed around them, "Should I kiss him, then?" Remus' ears nearly burst from the enthusiastic response.

Before Remus could react, Sirius grabbed him by the back of the head and pressed their lips together. Remus stood there stunned. What should he do? What did one normally do when snogging their friend in the middle of a room of fangirls? Luckily, Remus did not have to think because Sirius pulled away. He grinned at the crowd; Sirius was obviously enjoying the attention. "I hope you all enjoyed that as much as I did." Once again the crowd's response was earsplitting.

Remus still stood there stunned. Sirius just kissed him, and he said he enjoyed it. Could the night get any better?


	5. Peter Pettigrew

**Chapter Five: **Peter Pettigrew  
**Rating:** Teen but there is some heavy language  
**Word count: **788  
**Summary: **Peter Pettigrew makes his big appearance! Remus and Sirius leave the party, finally! They run in to Peter who is supposed to be on look-out duty.  
**A/N:** I'd like to dedicate this chapter to the forgotten Marauder Peter. This chapter makes me almost feel sorry for Peter … almost.

The hallway on the seventh floor was relatively vacant. The word 'relatively' is used because there was one lone boy standing in the corridor. He was a jumpy lad. Every sound that was made by the old castle gave him a fright. The boy had a butterbeer clutched to his chest, as if the bottle contained the essence of his soul. Why wasn't this boy at the party? He was on look-out of course! Someone had to do the job and who better than the forgotten Marauder – Peter Pettigrew.

---

Remus still felt the after-shock from the kiss. He was only vaguely aware of the squealing girls surrounding Sirius and he.

"I'm sorry, ladies," he heard Sirius say, "that's all you are going to see." There was a large unified sigh of disappointment from the girls.

Sirius gave the girls a final grin before he turned to go back to the snack table. Remus figured he'd better follow; he didn't want to be stuck in another tricky situation. By the time Remus manoeuvred his way to the table, Sirius had already poured himself a glass of Firewhisky.

"All that attention really gets one parched," Sirius said before he downed his glass in one shot. Remus watched with a look of scorn on his face. He really hoped that Sirius wouldn't get drunk. Remus did not feel like putting up with the philosopher Sirius tended to become. Also, he doubted he would get an encore to his kiss with an intoxicated Sirius – well, an encore with meaning.

"Gawd, you look awful, Moony," Sirius said, mid-pour. He set the cup and bottle back down on the table and put his hand on Remus' shoulder. His shoulder instantly began to tingle at the touch. "Do you want to head up to the common room now?"

Remus instantly perked up. This was the question he had been waiting for, "Yeah, I think I'll go. I wouldn't want anything strange happening."

Sirius patted Remus' shoulder, making his whole arm tingle, before removing it and heading for the door.

"Are you leaving already, Sirius?" a girl said, ambushing them.

"Unfortunately, Messr. Remus has had too much to drink, and I volunteered to escort him to the common room," Sirius said, turning himself into the hero.

"Oh, Sirius, that's so noble of you," she said with stars in her eyes.

"It's nothing. I would do anything for a friend," he had his charming grin on again. 'Arrogant prick,' Remus thought, but he couldn't help but feel flustered at Sirius smile.

The boys were intercepted a good three times before they finally reached the door.

"Fangirls," Sirius said, opening the door, "gotta love them." He motioned for Remus to leave first, then he followed.

"What the bloody hell do you think you are doing?" Sirius bellowed. Remus turned around just in time to see Peter Pettigrew jump a good meter off the ground, spilling his butterbeer.

"Oh, Sirius," Peter said, looking relieved, "you scared me there. I thought you might have been—"

"If you had the bloody map out you would have known it was us!" Sirius growled. "How the hell do you think you are going to keep watch if all you've got in your ruddy hand's a bottle of butterbeer! You think that'll stop Filch? You're so pathetic."

"I'm sorry, Padfoot. I'm so stupid …" Remus felt sorry for Peter. If Sirius wasn't insulting him, he was using Peter in someway or another. James wasn't any better towards the boy. Remus wasn't guiltless either. He was always present when the boy was abused, but he stood back and did nothing. Just like what he was doing now. "… and I should have never taken my eyes off the map –"

"Stop your grovelling, Wormtail," Sirius snapped, aggravated. "Now where did the idiot put the map?"

Peter looked like he was about to cry, "The map is in my pocket, Padfoot."

Remus noticed a corner of the parchment sticking out of Peter's pant pocket. Obviously, Sirius noticed as well, "Oh, that's a brilliant place to put the map when you are on look out. I don't know why we trust you with important jobs like this. You are utterly useless!" Sirius barked as he roughly shoved his hand in the boy's pocket to fish out the map. Remus watched jealously. For the first time in his life he wished he was Peter Pettigrew.

"I solemnly swear that I am up to no good," Sirius said, tapping the blank parchment with his wand. The paper instantly turned into an elaborate map. Remus waited impatiently for Sirius to plan their route. While Peter was holding back tears, Remus anticipated what would happen in the common room.


	6. Necking and Neckties

**Chapter Six:** Necking and Neckties  
**Rating: **Teen :(  
**Word count: **474  
**Summary:** Remus and Sirius are now in the common room. Now the touching begins (yay!).  
**Author's Notes:** Sorry for the wait. It seems that the fates have been conspiring against me. I've suffered a computer related wrist injury, writer's block, and bad internet connection. But it's up now! Yay! Shout out to grammarslash who let me borrow a computer.

* * *

"Password," said the Fat Lady as Remus and Sirius approached. 

Sirius stood confidently in front of the portrait and opened his mouth to answer. No sound came out of his mouth. Obviously, he had forgotten the password. "Uh … Remus, help me out here."

Remus let out a frusturated sigh. They were so close to the dorm room, and Sirius, like always, had to slow things down. "The password is_ nephilim_."

"Well, how is someone supposed to remember something crazy like that?" Sirius grumbled as he stepped through the open portrait hole. Remus followed swiftly behind him.

He had barely gotten out of the passageway when Sirius began to discard his clothing. He had kicked off his shoes and removed his robes. Remus hoped that he was going to remove more items of clothing, but it was in vain.

Sirius flopped down on the couch nearest the fire, and placed his feet on the table. "Moony, you look tense," Sirius said, loosening the buttons of his shirt. "C'mon, relax a little. I promise I won't tell anybody if you loosen your tie."

Remus gave an exasperated snort, "Oh, I wouldn't want anyone to find out." He removed his robes and sat next to his friend, his eyes carefully avoiding the patch of bare skin.

Sirius rolled up his sleeves and put his hands behind his head, stretching. Remus watched hungrily as Sirius' shirt rose up, revealing the little trail of hair leading to his bits. Remus forced himself to pry his gaze away. He firmly planted his eyes on the fire.

"Whatcha thinking about, Moony?" Sirius asked, his eyes half-closed.

"I'm just thinking about fire," he said quickly, before realizing that that comment made him sound like a pyro. "I mean, it's interesting to watch."

"Uh-huh," Sirius said, not really playing attention. "You know what I'm thinking about?"

"Um…" Remus said, giving it some thought, but nothing came to mind. "I don't know."

Sirius opened his eyes and sat up. "I'm thinking about this." Sirius moved in and pressed his lips onto Remus'.

Remus tensed up. This couldn't be happening, but it _was_. He instantly relaxed and began to kiss back. Sirius rested his hand on Remus' inner thigh, making him jump slightly. Sirius pulled back and looked at Remus with a quizzical look on his face. This was not a good look. Remus grabbed the back of Sirius' head, pressing their lips together.

Sirius leaned forward, causing Remus to lean against the arm of the couch. Sirius moved his lips, outlining Remus' jaw line. He moved his lips onto Remus' ear, playfully gnawing on it. Remus let out a whimper of pleasure. He ran his fingers through Sirius' wavy locks, relishing the feeling.

Sirius moved down Remus' neck, nibbling as he went down. He stopped and looked up, "Remus, this tie must go."

* * *

**Author's Note2: **Next chapter smut! Hurrah! 


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